Expat Life, Psychology & Musings, Psychology & Wellbeing

It Looks Like a Holiday; It Aint.

One day it’s me; next day it’s him. One of us is always unsettled. 

We recognise nothing, and we know nowhere. On the one hand, it’s exciting and fills me with a sense of adventure. On the other hand, it’s damn frustrating and completely unsettling. 

Coupled with our new surroundings, there are so many things we have to do. A new car, a new home, stuff to put in the home, making sure the stuff arrives in time for moving into the new home (or you must resort to blow up sofas…), bills to set up, social security numbers to sort out. Everything has to change, and everything needs to be organised. 

Not only do we have to make these decisions, every one we make we’re making for the next three years of our lives. To get the best deal, the car lease has to be for three years. We’d love to be able to change our minds and buy a new sofa every year, but we can’t afford to. And, if possible, we don’t want to be moving rental homes three times in as many years.

Unfortunately, my husband is one of those people who has a particularly hard time relaxing until everything is done. He hates having a to-do list, and this is the ultimate one. I am more of a last minute kinda gal; I get stressed when the consequence of not doing something a few weeks earlier is staring me in the face. It’s not a great combination.

This is all well and good but I’m sure you’re thinking what I’m describing is much like any newly weds moving into a new home anywhere in the world right?

Well yes it is, but making these decisions in a country you’re familiar with is one thing; making them in a place where you know nothing is doubly stressful.

To top it off, while we bicker back and forth about which sofa to get and what colour scheme to go for, it’s 85 degrees outside. We have an outdoor pool as part of our temporary accommodation and we’ve come from what felt distinctly like winter (despite it being late April in the UK) to what feels very much like the hottest summer on UK record. And this is only the beginning. If you didn’t know why we were here, it’d look distinctly like a blooming good holiday destination.  

2015-05-21 07.37.06

(The sun has pretty much gone down and the chairs have cleared but you get the gist.)

The party girl in me wants to sit in the sun, drink beers and get an awesome suntan. The angel on my shoulder is prodding me about all the things I need to do. There’s getting things moving for when my work permit arrives in a few weeks. Shopping for cars and furniture (neither of which fill me with joy). I know I should be saving money since I have no job and no guarantee of work when I start my business stateside (despite success in the UK). And, last but not least, supporting my hard working husband who is also keeping down a full-time job while managing the stress of the above, and managing party girl me whining about why we’re not playing holiday.

So, while I know there are many things we can do nothing about and many things will just happen when they happen, I’m sure I should be doing more than sitting on a lounger in the blazing sunshine typing this. 

Oh well, I guess whoever and wherever you are things are never perfect. Sometimes, you just have to forget all of life’s stresses and take the little bits of sunshine pleasure while you can. 

2 thoughts on “It Looks Like a Holiday; It Aint.”

  1. Thanks Anne! Don’t worry, there’s certainly some fun happening too but currently there’s a lot to manage and it’s not as holiday like as I would like!!


  2. Becca!!!!!’ What is going on??? Do I need to come over and sort you both out!

    1) Get in that swimming pool
    2) Order a beer
    3) Get a ‘tick list’ going regardless if you or Terry like or not. It helps….work out what you can complete without Terry and Terry needs to be involved in, let him do it.
    3) have another swim
    4) sort food out for later
    5) have a lovely evening with each other👻

    Have some FUN!!!!!


    Liked by 1 person

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