When I woke this morning, from a restless sleep, I couldn’t decide whether I felt nervous or excited about my day trip to the City. I was tired and irritable, and it was stupidly hot in our apartment. We have yet to get the air con right. Currently, it’s either a sauna or the wind tunnel in our pad. I took this photograph to try to capture how I was feeling at that moment. I took it a few times after chastising the camera for picking up what I like to call ‘my gammy eye’. I always wonder if it’s as noticeable in real life as it is in photos. Anyway, it’s me, so here I am first thing and feeling glum.
I battled with myself about the reasons for feeling low as I woke. I knew I was one of the luckiest girls in the world, with money to spend, time on my hands and one of the greatest cities in the world to explore. I was excited, but I was filled with trepidation. Once again, I was setting out on my lonesome.
As the morning went on, I got dressed, packed my back with essentials for the day – laptop, phone, money and sunscreen – and tried to muster up some enthusiasm for what was to come. My husband arrived home from his morning squash session and his face told the story of how I felt. I asked him what was wrong; he said he wasn’t sure, he just felt glum. Instantly I understood. I assured him that we’d be ok and that things would get simpler, that we’d settle and become familiar with our new lives. As I said the words, I knew I was trying to reassure myself as much as I was him.
It was time to head out, him for work, me for city slicking. He dropped me at the station, and I climbed the stairs to the concourse. I could sense him watching me from the car as I went off on my adventure. As I walked along the platform, the excitement creeped up inside of me. Here I was, about to hit the big city, armed with my laptop and ready to see and write my way through another day.
I felt taller, braver and ready for whatever the day could give me. I think I look a bit brighter too!
The train was busy, and the familiar city sight of middle empty seats on a 6-seat compartment were rife. I opted to stand, and in true city girl style I found a place to lean. Armed with my coffee and book, I mingled with the crowd. I managed to read one page before the excitement got the better of me. I felt like a little girl, willing the train to drive faster so that I could see the beautiful New York streets once again.
As we pulled into Grand Central, I knew I’d have to grab a Joe’s Coffee – dubbed one of the best coffee houses in NYC – to accompany me on my travels. Queue out of the door – as I expected – I got my iced latte fix and a salted chocolate chip cookie.